She is the Ancient: A Genderbent Curse of Strahd – S1E2: “CSI Barovia”

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Read the Episode Synopsis Here:


Upon finishing funeral rites for the former Burgomaster, Sar reminds the party that there is an issue within the church that needs to be dealt with. Sar explains she heard a voice crying out from under the church floor screaming “Mother!” and “I’m so hungry!” The priestess immediately insists it is her own family business and requests the group leave the church immediately. The party of course ignores this and enters the church by force.

A Charming Rat

As everyone hears the voice crying out, Ireena comes out of the charm spell Roxy used on her. She berates Roxy for using magic on her, but as Roxy attempts to apologize and explain their actions, wild magic hits again turning Roxy into a rat. Rat Roxy is then carried through the church by Baby Boombox. 

CSI Barovia

DJ tastes their way through the church to discover a trap door in the floor of a dilapidated room. Using thieves’ tools stored in their tongue (which is no longer a centipede) DJ picks the lock on the trap door and jumps into the basement. Fearing the voice in the basement may not simply be some mistreated child, Tod, Baby Boombox, and Rat Roxy follow, while Sarzaneth remains outside with Ismark for his safety.

Skitter skitter skitter, MFers

In the basement DJ, Rat Roxy, and Tod find the figure of a person huddled in the far corner of the basement. Suddenly, Roxy returns to human form while hiding between two stairs and getting stuck between them. Meanwhile, the figure in the corner, a vampire spawn, crawls her way up to the ceiling and skitters toward the party. Baby Boombox breaks Roxy loose while Tod attempts to shove everyone up the stairs. They aren’t fast enough as the creature drops from the ceiling on top of them. 


Once there the party debates with Ireena and the priestess about removing the burgomaster’s head to prevent her from rising as an undead creature. Roxy utilizes Charm Person to convince Ireena that removing her mother’s head is the safest option. Ireena agrees and the priestess begins the ceremony as Sarzaneth informs the party that there is a concerning issue that must be dealt with in the church.

Drop the Bass

The party haphazardly fends off the vampire while Baby Boombox saves the day and “drops the bass” on the vampire exploding in the vampire’s face. The creature’s entire head disintegrates while Baby Boombox is knit back together with black, metallic thread. DJ collects some vampire scraps and reforms themself after taking damage during the fight, while the compassionate Roxy goes to check on the priestess who is wailing in distress. After failed attempts at consoling the priestess, the party, Ireena, and Ismark make their way back through the town. The party, somewhat reluctantly, agrees to accompany Ireena and Ismark to Valaki.

Baby Boombox Makes Another Kill

Relieved, Ireena states she knows where the party can obtain horses. She leads everyone back to the Blood on the Vine Tavern where Arika and Gorek, the owners of the tavern, are caring for two horses in a nearby stable. DJ immediately claims the horses for the party. Tod and Roxy discuss what value is appropriate to rent the horses, ignoring the owner’s bewildered protests. When the owner is unwilling to rent the horses out, Roxy charms her. The party pays Arika for the horses, and while she gathers supplies Dr. Jericho inspects her partner who looks quite ill and weak.

Gorek is leaning against the stables wheezing. DJ licks him and is able to tell that he is dying from a magical ailment and will die a gruesome death in two days time. DJ offers to help ease Gorek’s passing as Baby Boombox wraps their metal cables around Gorek’s mouth and nose cutting off their breath. Once Gorek is dead, DJ consumes his body. The party then quickly jumps on the horses and flees the village. And thus the village of Barovia is left behind. 🦇


Episode three airs next Tuesday from 5-7pm PST on

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